Recently a
friend posted a FB question. It was a simple yes or no question and no further explanation
was wanted other than a simple Yes or No. The question was: “Are you better off than you were 4 years ago?”
My first
thought and response was, Yes, financially, emotionally & spiritually. So I
typed in my YES response and let it go at that. It did however get my mind
wondering, and now, looking back, I think she was asking in a more politically
charged way, but that was not my initial reaction to this question. I like to view
myself as a work in process and as an optimist, so my yes answer came from a place
of making progress and growing as a person. It was only after I saw some of the
other responses (made by those people that did not follow her request for a simple
yes or no) that I realized I may have been too quick to make my answer about me
personally and not about the circumstances as a whole that I am in. But, that’s
just how I roll and I was born a blonde!
Also, let me state that I will NEVER blog about politics and do not like
to use any social forums for my opinions for either political party. Let’s just say I am a proud American and would
like to see our country improve and prosper in many ways! Done!
So now that
I have had time to think about my answer, I will use this forum to explain my
response! First let me tackle the financial response! I took the question literally and YES was a
truthful reply. You see, if I went back exactly 4 years ago, my hubby was in
between jobs and I was beginning a new one. So, even though my current annual
household income is now 65% LESS than what it used to be, it is better than it
was on September 1st, 2008.
At that time a had sold my McMansion (at
a loss) and was looking to downsize due to loss of high paying jobs and needed to
do a total overhaul on my lifestyle. Gone were the good old abundant days in
the building industry, which both the hubby and I are in. So, bounce forward to September 1, 2012 and both
of us are employed and the bills get paid each month and the kiddos have
clothes on their back and food in their bellies, I consider us blessed. By now
y’all must know that I never confuse financials as a means of measuring my
success anyway!
Emotionally
is a tough one. You see 4 years ago I was not in a good place. A series of unfortunate
events had run through my life and torn me into tiny little pieces. Sometimes you
must learn the hard way that things are not what they seem and that in an
instant your world can be turned upside down. People you thought had your back
end up sticking daggers in you and try to destroy what it took so many years to
build. Relationships you thought were great and uplifting can be masked by
lies, secrets & deceit. Sick minded individuals can affect your perfectly “normal
life” and throw you for a loop. We can be so easily thrown into a tornado of emotions
and heart ache that we feel so incredibly alone and lost. It takes a lot of
courage, strength and faith to pick yourself out of situations you find yourself
in. Although I don’t believe that time heals, it definitely puts distance
between you and the pain. In hindsight we are able to look back and realize how
strong and courageous we were and appreciate that we have the ability to choose
to be survivors and not victims. I will also
always believe in the saying my Mom has used my entire life, “when you are
hurting, you are growing.” When you have come out the other side victoriously,
you are wiser and have matured emotionally. Knowing that embracing the pain and
hurt, grieving for the loss of what once was and accepting that I am now a
changed and better person because I endured. So, yes, I am better off
emotionally than I was exactly 4 years ago.
Spiritually...
I am driven from the spiritually centered place within myself. It is my safe
place and what I fall back on when I start to stumble. It is my foundation, so
to speak. You see, whenever life throws those curve balls, it is my spirit &
faith that allows me to know that everything will be okay! I am never truly alone and that there is a
divine plan for my life. I can get through anything that presents itself, good
or bad, because I believe! It’s that simple!
Either Yes
or No being the answer to that original question….It’s all good! If you can definitively say yes, then you
have a positive outlook, things are going well and you may have a sense of
peace and a hope for the future and happy with the growth that has taken place.
If you stated a clear no, then it was an opportunity to reflect back on the
last few years and look at some areas where you can improve and give a hope to
a brighter future. Maybe there was some major “stuff” going on in your life
that brought about changes that you are adjusting to. If that is the case you
can celebrate by wearing the “I Survived
(fill in the blank)” t-shirt!
Perhaps it
was simply your perspective on the question at hand. If you immediately look at
that question as a political question, then everyone is going to have an
opinion. In good times or trying times, I will never allow the political arena
to define if “I” am better now than
I was 4 years ago. Yes, the governing body of our country and their decisions
can affect my circumstances and I may not like some of the changes but, it is
up to each of us to become better. I will always be a work in progress, always
growing, working on making better choices, surrounding myself with those that
uplift and inspire, spending time on the things that matter and with people
that matter, thus creating a better “me”.
Just Sayin’,
Christina
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